A HEART THING - by Calvin
There's an inherent conflict between the joy of resurrection in Christ and participating in his suffering along our journey of faith. Some may tell you that life in Christ is a life of joy, happiness and prosperity, but I tell you that those are mere idols compared to experiencing Jesus through entering into his suffering. To know Jesus will include the experience of sorrow and to become like him demands a willingness to enter into his anguish.
Right now, it's a heart thing for me. As I search for The Lost Room of my heart, the exploration of my soul has become quite painful. I am jarred by emotional forces that pierce me with profound love. Then I am plunged into sadness where I am beginning to relive pain from a distant past. Tears flow and my heart aches with ecstatic sorrow. The path beyond the narrow gate has some rough and bumpy stretches along the way.
I am a lost boy. The early years of my life are all but missing to me. A few old photographs only confirm the gaps in time and memory. Who was that little boy with vacant eyes hiding behind a quizzical smile? There is a sense of chaos and fear. It seems that I learned to be a peacemaker in a land where there was no peace. But musical memories and the testimony of another farm boy named Johnny Cash are helping me encounter some of my most significant points of pain.
Where will this take me? I'm not sure, but I am certain of one thing. "I want to know Christ—yes, to know the power of his resurrection and participation in his sufferings, becoming like him in his death, and so, somehow, attaining to the resurrection from the dead." (Philippians 3:10-11 TNIV) Therefore I am willing to experience this season of suffering. My faith is being tested but I am more afraid that if I run in the other direction I will miss Jesus. By faith, I worship God alone. By faith, a little boy will be raised from the dead. After all, my name is written on the palm of God's hand.
This is my present struggle. How about you? Leave a comment.
At His Mercy,
Calvin
Right now, it's a heart thing for me. As I search for The Lost Room of my heart, the exploration of my soul has become quite painful. I am jarred by emotional forces that pierce me with profound love. Then I am plunged into sadness where I am beginning to relive pain from a distant past. Tears flow and my heart aches with ecstatic sorrow. The path beyond the narrow gate has some rough and bumpy stretches along the way.
I am a lost boy. The early years of my life are all but missing to me. A few old photographs only confirm the gaps in time and memory. Who was that little boy with vacant eyes hiding behind a quizzical smile? There is a sense of chaos and fear. It seems that I learned to be a peacemaker in a land where there was no peace. But musical memories and the testimony of another farm boy named Johnny Cash are helping me encounter some of my most significant points of pain.
Where will this take me? I'm not sure, but I am certain of one thing. "I want to know Christ—yes, to know the power of his resurrection and participation in his sufferings, becoming like him in his death, and so, somehow, attaining to the resurrection from the dead." (Philippians 3:10-11 TNIV) Therefore I am willing to experience this season of suffering. My faith is being tested but I am more afraid that if I run in the other direction I will miss Jesus. By faith, I worship God alone. By faith, a little boy will be raised from the dead. After all, my name is written on the palm of God's hand.
This is my present struggle. How about you? Leave a comment.
At His Mercy,
Calvin











Lamentations 3:1-40 should be as painfully familiar unto you as it is for me.
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Brother FishHawk,
Even the chosen of God will suffer and lament. But the love of our heavenly Father sends fresh compassion every morning. We walk together. We are not consumed. Thanks for the Word.
At His Mercy,
Calvin
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